Whats it like living in an insane asylum, is it free, how are you treated, they forced you to leave, recreatio?


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Whats it like living in an insane asylum, is it free, how are you treated, they forced you to leave, recreationAnyone have info about living in Info about living in an insane asylum or psychiatric ward?I don't really want to be treated, I just want to be commited to one, and live out my life there.Seriously, does anyone have any real advice on how I can just drop out of society and the rat race? Its not healthy for me. And keeping a malcontent like me among society can't be good for society either. For my own good and society's I just need to be isolated from my "fellow" humans. they will only harm me, and I will only harm them. Thats what the Lutheran Kierkegaard thinks the Catholics got right and the Protestants are missing. The monasteries were a safety valve that allowed people antagonistic to this world, to escape it without disrupting the system. We really don't have that in our age, other than the "choice" to starve on the street, which is where I'm headed. There really is no safety valve or escape hatch. I don't know maybe there are some deserted islands out there in the Pacific, where I could literally be a Robinson Crusoe. Probably not realistic though. Well if those islands exists, I suppose its possible I could somehow get there with a few thousand dollars. I probably wouldn't last long in the wild. But nature is a less cruel enemy than man. Nature will kill me but not enslave me. Or being a hermit somehow, but that takes capital. I just need to getaway from it all. I reject all social relations. I never want to see another human again. The very sight and smell of them repulses me. I've really lost touch. I just don't get humans. I used to think I did. But the more I study them, the less I understand them. Or maybe I understand them empirically, I know what they actually do and on an intellectual scientific level I can understand their motivations partially. But I can't get inside their heads. Their endless cruelty just escapes me.I mean I guess part of it is the Hegelian recognition, the master must enslave to be recognized. And Nieztche elaborated on it as the will to power. And you can try and make it scientific by just transmitting the Will to Gene. The human fascination and lust for cruelty just escapes me. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe that is what you need to survive, and I'm just a Darwinian miscarriage. Or maybe I have too much of Freud's superego. I've internalized too much of what society SAYS is good and become that. In that sense I am the society I hate so much- personified.I'm the materialization of the spiritual imagination of society. I'm the Feurbachian God made flesh. I can understand the mind of God, which is the spirtitualization of society, more clearly than that of man. The regret at what man could have been and what he actually is before the flood. I suppose the God's eye view of the universe, is a curse and burden to us worm, dust, dirt.I belong in solitary confinement. The prison population of course is the embodiment and hyperdistortion of man's will to power, although I would say the difference with the general population is only quantitative in nature. So obviously prison itself is no utopia. But solitary confinement in the "hole" would be my paradise. To be free from all human contact and all activity. To just sit in an empty cell 24 hours a day. And to have guards slide in the food. It has come to the point where my only conception of freedom is liberty from humanity. And so freedom becomes a prison cell. IDK, I guess at the rate I'm going I will probably end up in an insane asulym believing I'm Napoleon Bonaparte. As long as I make the leap of faith and truly believe I'm the Emperor, then nothing can imprison me. The insane asulym is in its own way a utopia, and it beats the streets. It is kind of like Plato's Republic. With the Golden Guardians. Maybe I will memorize Napoleon's memoirs and not let anyone convince me that I'm not Bonaparte. What could be a better life than living in Plato's Republic convinced you are the Emperor.I think for my personality relative isolation would be far worse than total isolation. I'm a spiteful resentful person who can not bear having my social betters above me. I'm in a period of relative isolation now having dropped of school and not seeking a job. Just living off my money which should last .5 to 1 year. I was friendly and jovial with my housemates at first, but now I try to avoid seeing them. The thing about my depression and need for social isolation, is it stems more from existential metaphysics than anything personal. So I'm basically getting a taste of what living on a fixed income would be like now. And the USA has one of the worst welfare states in the world, we love the struggle to the death.I'm thinking of committing myself, but not being cured. In a way it is utopian. Like Plato's Republic being watched over by authoritarian all-powerful guardians who are trying to fix you. There is complete equa